Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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