His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
