We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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