i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
