whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
