i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Randomize
