I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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