I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Randomize
