$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize