Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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