Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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