so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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