All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Randomize
