go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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