How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
