3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Every concussion has its silver lining
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize
