its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
