Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I think my vagina is haunted
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize
