I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
