the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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