He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
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