He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize
