I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s