i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
21 Awkward Ways People Found Out Their Partner Was Into Outrageous Sex Acts
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.