I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
10+ Incredible Tumblr Stories That Will Leave You Shook
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?