Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.