i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Randomize
