Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
this hospital has no fireball
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
