Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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