If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
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