I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Randomize