More tranny stories later!
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I just found puke in my bra..
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
