Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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