It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Randomize