Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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