its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Randomize
