Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
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high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
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She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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