Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
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