I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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