but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
