I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
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