come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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