Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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