all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize