Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Randomize
