woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
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