Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
