Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
