So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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