we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Randomize
