Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
